I’m writing this blog on the heels of one of the slowest sports weeks of the year. Major League Baseball has been mostly dormant, with the exception of the mid-summer classic, and the rest of the professional sports leagues are slumbering or locked in contract negotiations.The FIFA Women’s World Cup is going on supposedly, but I’ve become desensitized to watching women on TV or the Internet engaging in anything other than pornography, so that’s out. The New World Order has successfully removed the top black athlete from the PGA, so golf has lost it’s scant appeal. It’s back to the usual, “which boring rich white guy in bright green plaid pants will win this week” routine. When is the world of golf going to realize that it needs a little more Happy Gilmore and a little less Shooter McGavin? This athletic dry-spell creates a good opportunity for listening to some very entertaining sports talk radio at least. What better way to ease the misery of my commute home than hearing baseball trade proposals from Sal on Staten Island or fantasy football draft planning from Rocco in New Rochelle. Keeping with the theme, I’m going to focus this weeks Coffee and Scotch rant on three aspects of baseball that need an overhaul and which have been getting a lot of airtime on the AM band this week. For the sake of perspective, I’m a perennially disgruntled Mets fan, so take it all with a grain of salt.
The major topic of the week has been the MLB All Star Game. The slow decline of the event, from it’s glory days of pride and competition to it’s current state of meaningless irrelevancy, has been well discussed. In recent years, the MLB has tried to inject purpose by having the outcome determine which league gains home field advantage in the World Series. I imagine the same thought process occurred when some unfortunate confectioner decided that powdered donuts weren’t good enough and they needed jelly injected into them. Classic fuck-up. Unfortunately, this tactic has simply not worked and we’re stuck trying to figure out how to scoop the damn jelly out so we can enjoy the purity of the donut again, which is always a shitty mess. Most of today's baseball stars are so delusionally self-absorbed that they can’t be bothered showing up, let alone playing in an “extra” game. The players who do show seem to play the game with no level of passion or real desire to win. It’s like going to work on Friday, sure you go but are you really giving it your all? Don’t get me started about how ridiculous the Home Run Derby is either. The Chris Berman, “back, back, back” home run call makes me want to throw my TV out the window. They ought to nominate an all-star announcer every year and allow them to call the home run derby and the game. Back on point, my proposed solution for the All Star Game is not to add or modify the rewards for the winning team, frankly I’d prefer if they removed any type of artificial incentive altogether. It’s the one time that Major League Baseball allows the fans to control who plays and who doesn’t. Sure, the managers get a few picks as well, but we have the opportunity to tell the prima donna players that we’re sick of their bullshit. I propose that we band together and throw the vote. Let’s send the leagues worst players out there and send baseball a clear message. And what better time to do it than with Citifield as the proposed site of the 2013 game? Hey, at least the worst players in the game won’t have to travel very far to get there.
My biggest complaint with Major League baseball is the difference in the rules between the two leagues. This topic has been beaten like a dead horse but I want to get my two cents in. Being a National League fan, I’m generally inclined to believe that having pitchers hit is better for the game of baseball in terms of strategy and complexity. However, the designated hitter (DH) allows the sport to more effectively showcase its most popular aspect, the home run. If baseball is like sex, National League baseball is missionary, lights out, don’t make too much noise and wake up the kids sex; while American League baseball is hot, sweaty, spontaneous vacation sex. Home runs are the money shot and the designated hitter is like baseball Viagra. Whichever rule set you prefer is fine by me, my angst is with the simple illogical fact that the two leagues play a different game. The problem is further compounded every year with another baseball anomaly, inter-league play. National League baseball teams cannot compete on a level playing field with American League teams because they're not built around the DH. There is simply no consideration given to a National League team’s roster to carry a player solely for his offensive output. In the NL, bench spots need to be allocated for flexible players who can be used situationally for double switches, pinch hitting and injury replacement. For the sake of brevity I won’t get into the minutea of bunting, the wheel play, the butcher boy, pinch running, pinch hitting, double switching, or the value in clearing the pitchers spot at the bottom of the batting order, but in the interest of fair play can we level the playing field and decide on a unified set of rules?
My final thought on baseball ties back into the players lackluster feelings about the All Star Game and their level of non-participation in it. Presumably, these guys have gotten to big for their stir-ups, with their bloated contracts and superstar statuses. Obviously, with the players union as strong as it is, major contract and salary changes are not likely to ever happen, but what if? What if baseball adopted a single contract that all players worked under? Every player is allowed to negotiate their base pay and the length of their individual terms of employment with a specific team. The base pay has a league minimum, as it does now, and a maximum “cap” set to something reasonable like five million dollars. Every dollar a player earns beyond their contractual base pay is incentivized, so performance is heavily rewarded. Every game played, base hit, home run, RBI, stolen base, strike out, and saved game are monetarily rewarded. Every aspect of the game is incentivized and built into every players contract. The players have nearly unlimited earning potential, assuming they stay healthy and perform well. The owners only pay for the kind of results that sell tickets and create successful franchises. The fans stop getting screwed by superstars who don’t seem to give a shit anymore. In my opinion, and obviously that’s the only one that matters here in my world, the system would work and would help baseball bring sexy back.
I’m writing this blog on the heels of one of the slowest sports weeks of the year. Major League Baseball has been mostly dormant, with the exception of the mid-summer classic, and the rest of the professional sports leagues are slumbering or locked in contract negotiations.The FIFA Women’s World Cup is going on supposedly, but I’ve become desensitized to watching women on TV or the Internet engaging in anything other than pornography, so that’s out. The New World Order has successfully removed the top black athlete from the PGA, so golf has lost it’s scant appeal. It’s back to the usual, “which boring rich white guy in bright green plaid pants will win this week” routine. When is the world of golf going to realize that it needs a little more Happy Gilmore and a little less Shooter McGavin? This athletic dry-spell creates a good opportunity for listening to some very entertaining sports talk radio at least. What better way to ease the misery of my commute home than hearing baseball trade proposals from Sal on Staten Island or fantasy football draft planning from Rocco in New Rochelle. Keeping with the theme, I’m going to focus this weeks Coffee and Scotch rant on three aspects of baseball that need an overhaul and which have been getting a lot of airtime on the AM band this week. For the sake of perspective, I’m a perennially disgruntled Mets fan, so take it all with a grain of salt.
The major topic of the week has been the MLB All Star Game. The slow decline of the event, from it’s glory days of pride and competition to it’s current state of meaningless irrelevancy, has been well discussed. In recent years, the MLB has tried to inject purpose by having the outcome determine which league gains home field advantage in the World Series. I imagine the same thought process occurred when some unfortunate confectioner decided that powdered donuts weren’t good enough and they needed jelly injected into them. Classic fuck-up. Unfortunately, this tactic has simply not worked and we’re stuck trying to figure out how to scoop the damn jelly out so we can enjoy the purity of the donut again, which is always a shitty mess. Most of today's baseball stars are so delusionally self-absorbed that they can’t be bothered showing up, let alone playing in an “extra” game. The players who do show seem to play the game with no level of passion or real desire to win. It’s like going to work on Friday, sure you go but are you really giving it your all? Don’t get me started about how ridiculous the Home Run Derby is either. The Chris Berman, “back, back, back” home run call makes me want to throw my TV out the window. They ought to nominate an all-star announcer every year and allow them to call the home run derby and the game. Back on point, my proposed solution for the All Star Game is not to add or modify the rewards for the winning team, frankly I’d prefer if they removed any type of artificial incentive altogether. It’s the one time that Major League Baseball allows the fans to control who plays and who doesn’t. Sure, the managers get a few picks as well, but we have the opportunity to tell the prima donna players that we’re sick of their bullshit. I propose that we band together and throw the vote. Let’s send the leagues worst players out there and send baseball a clear message. And what better time to do it than with Citifield as the proposed site of the 2013 game? Hey, at least the worst players in the game won’t have to travel very far to get there.
My biggest complaint with Major League baseball is the difference in the rules between the two leagues. This topic has been beaten like a dead horse but I want to get my two cents in. Being a National League fan, I’m generally inclined to believe that having pitchers hit is better for the game of baseball in terms of strategy and complexity. However, the designated hitter (DH) allows the sport to more effectively showcase its most popular aspect, the home run. If baseball is like sex, National League baseball is missionary, lights out, don’t make too much noise and wake up the kids sex; while American League baseball is hot, sweaty, spontaneous vacation sex. Home runs are the money shot and the designated hitter is like baseball Viagra. Whichever rule set you prefer is fine by me, my angst is with the simple illogical fact that the two leagues play a different game. The problem is further compounded every year with another baseball anomaly, inter-league play. National League baseball teams cannot compete on a level playing field with American League teams because they're not built around the DH. There is simply no consideration given to a National League team’s roster to carry a player solely for his offensive output. In the NL, bench spots need to be allocated for flexible players who can be used situationally for double switches, pinch hitting and injury replacement. For the sake of brevity I won’t get into the minutea of bunting, the wheel play, the butcher boy, pinch running, pinch hitting, double switching, or the value in clearing the pitchers spot at the bottom of the batting order, but in the interest of fair play can we level the playing field and decide on a unified set of rules?
I happen to like the women's world cup but then again internet women porn wouldn't do anything for me.
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